Mary's Blog

What a beautiful day…

I had such a good time at the shower on Thursday! It was fun to catch up with everyone and to watch them laugh and have a good time. Loads of presents were wrapped in cute paper, and there were such adorable clothes! I think everything was pink! :-) People’s generosity is always amazing to me. I walked around smiling all afternoon thinking about the new life we will be welcoming into the world, so thankful that we have the things that we need and even some extra things that are just fun to have.

There have been many special occasions in our lives to celebrate. While we were at Jason’s parents’ house, I saw some photos of his graduation that we celebrated together. There was my graduation and our wedding, his PhD, my cancer recovery and our first home. But welcoming this little girl is a whole new level of joy. I feel her kicking and think to myself, “Whoever you are and whoever you become, you are so loved!” Sometimes I think of the things that can go wrong and get a little nervous. I am not one of those people who has faith that things will go well, because I have learned that things do not always go well, no matter what your faith. I do have faith, though, that whatever happens, we can handle it. That’s not as reassuring sometimes though, especially with all of my hopes for this little one. There are so many things that I hope she will be able to fully experience and enjoy in life! Jason and I are so excited to teach her and expose her to nature and art and the world. But first we have to get through delivery, diapers and toddlerhood. :-P

Thank you to all of the special people who joined us on Thursday and gave so generously, and to Amy and Doris Ellen for throwing such a beautiful shower! Your notes will slowly make their way to you. We will be traveling this week, and I feel like I am coming down with some sort of illness again, so it may take me a while to get up to speed. Lots of love!

23 Weeks – and Painting

In this week’s news: I received a very generous gift from my godmother in the mail! Thank you, Evie. :) Baby Girl continues to kick and grow, but it’s surprising that I am nearly six months pregnant. I have a belly, and I can definitely show it off with the right clothes, but I don’t feel like I look six months at all! I keep wondering if I’m eating enough. The only way to get more protein and enough calories is to load up on dairy, since we don’t really eat meat (I do eat some occasionally for Baby’s sake). So my diet has REALLY changed, and I wouldn’t be surprised if my cholesterol has shot up over 200! Who eats this much cheese and has milkshakes every day? LOL I figure my body can take it for a while.

Well, my cold is finally going away – it lasted about twice as long as Jason’s did! I guess what they say about your immune system going south during pregnancy is true. As soon as the worst of it was over, I went out and bought paint. This morning I finished up the two walls that I am going to do before our trip. Melanie is going to try to finish the room for me while we’re away – now that’s a nice gift! I have a bad hip in addition to my back and arm issues, so climbing up and down on the chair to paint the trim gets pretty painful. But I LOVE the color – what do you think? It might look a little too much like baby blue in this picture. In actuality, it has a hint of green in it. With our comforter, it looks like a normal bedroom color. But with a crib and some pink and white, it will definitely look like a nursery. :)

This week is going to be VERY busy in our house. Tomorrow is the start of International Sarcoma Awareness Week, and I manage that website. On Sunday there is a local Team Sarcoma event that we’ll be attending, and then we’ll be preparing for our travels down south. So there will be lots of packing and cleaning, oh my. I have been looking forward to this trip ever since we found out I was pregnant – it’s hard to truly celebrate a pregnancy without your family, you know? Yay!

She’s in there!

Well, I’m nearing 22 weeks now, and I have a cold in the middle of the summer. That makes two weeks in a row of some kind of ick – I hope this won’t become a trend! Girlie is still kicking away, and my appetite is picking up, so everything’s just fine despite the discomfort. I’ve been feeling so “blah” these past few days that I decided to take a few pictures today (see below). As soon as I’m feeling better, I plan to go buy paint and start on the two bedrooms upstairs. The colors are bright and cheerful – it’s going to be fun! Melanie has even volunteered to help out with the painting.

Every time a new pregnancy week rolls around, I get excited. We aren’t too many weeks from the “viability age” now, but if I’m anything like my mom, I’ll be cooking this girl long after the timer goes off. I’m excited about her name…we haven’t really gone public with it. But at least I can reveal her initials, right??? They are “AFS.” :-)

Jason and I have both been working non-stop lately. He’s researching and writing, and I’m handling website communications for Team Sarcoma (coming up July 17-25). I’ve also been taking on little projects, like organizing my closet now that I will be sharing it with Girlie. It will be a nice change of pace to get away to the Carolinas for ten days soon! I hear that my mom has been shopping and wrapping up a storm. ;)

You know, I used to have a lot of deep things to write about. These days, I tend to channel all of that energy into writing to other people who are sharing things online. So I write lots of thoughts out there in cyberspace, and by the time I get to my own blog I’m all drained of depth! I guess it’s a sign that our lives are not very dramatic lately, and it’s kinda nice…the calm before the storm, I’m sure. The most dramatic news for us is that our lives are hanging in the balance of a tenure decision that should be made in a month or two. I try not to stress about it too much. :) And one thing I have been doing is starting a special book for the Girlie – it will share our history with her up to and including the pregnancy. So I’m gathering old photos and writing my thoughts as the pregnancy progresses.

I guess that’s all for now – hope you are well!

Growing, growing

This week has been busy! We went to New Hampshire for the Free State Project’s annual festival. It was fun to be with so many friends, but I must admit that the 9 hour drive wore me out…twice! The best part of the weekend was probably sitting  by the fire and eating smores…ahh, summer. :)

After the weekend, I suffered another horrific bout of intestinal drama. I have no idea what causes this, but it seems to happen about once a month. The first time it happened, I was sure I was miscarrying. Now I know what’s going on, but it seems to get worse each time it happens, probably because my belly is getting bigger and more crowded. It’s been two days since the episode, and my lower abdomen is still very sore. But I saw the doctor for my checkup today, and baby’s heartbeat was just fine. She kicked repeatedly while he monitored her. :-) I’ve gained about 10 pounds and my blood pressure is still normal – a little higher than it usually is, but I’m usually barely alive. ;)

Several of you have been asking about my baby registry. There is a link to it right below the title of my blog. Or you can use this link: http://tinyurl.com/2dr64kx Most items ordered from Amazon are delivered within a week with free shipping and no sales tax! But look, presents aren’t the point anyway. I hope to see lots of you during my visit to South Carolina in July – can’t wait!

Almost halfway there!

I am loving the second trimester. I feel SO MUCH better. :-) We’ve started purchasing some practical things, but I have to admit I’ve also been scouring the clearance racks for deals! Of course, most of the clothes are for the summer, so I’ve bought some for next summer and only a few things that are bigger than that. I’ve also founds some great deals on eBay and etsy. Check out this adorable diaper cover that will work with our cloth diapers! It’s actually much cheaper to purchase homemade things online – and it’s nice to support other moms too. My friend Melanie has started hunting at garage sales for us. In fact, I have two bags of goodies sitting here that she dropped off this afternoon! She even found a bunch of socks for $3. It’s hard to believe how much stores charge for baby socks!

We’ve chosen a name! Well, we are about 99% sure that we’ve chosen a name, so we are keeping it under wraps just in case we have a change of heart. She has started kicking more now, and I am definitely enjoying it. Her feet aren’t big enough to do any damage just yet. ;)

I also think I’ve chosen a crib set for later (after she has her own room). I ordered the valance to see what it will look like in our room and if I can make the colors work. I’m hoping we can pull the aqua color out of it and use that on the walls, but it’s a long shot. I’m trying to keep things simple and not get too enthralled with “stuff.” At the same time, I don’t think my body will handle the third trimester too well, so I’m trying to get a lot of things done while I feel great.

We are heading to New Hampshire to visit friends soon! And our time with family is coming up in July – I am so looking forward to that! Finally, I’ve been asked to post a picture – so here I am at 19 weeks (on the right). You can click on it to see a little of the baby belly. Much love!

Anticipation

It was more than 11 years ago, but I remember the anticipation leading up to our wedding. We were just out of college, and I didn’t know where we would be living, what I would be doing, or what it would be like to live with someone. It was definitely the most exciting six months of my life…until now.

Waiting to hear the gender of the baby has been so exciting for me! I guess I have been expecting that today’s ultrasound would make me feel more connected with this new little one. I was also anxious to see if everything looks okay with the pregnancy. Over the past few weeks, the anticipation has made me think about gender and all of the ideas we attach to gender. Sometimes we unintentionally limit a human being because of what we think they “should” and “shouldn’t do” as a male or female. I want my child to be exposed to an incredible variety of opportunities, activities and information, regardless of what boys and girls typically like. It will be interesting to see how she will respond.

This past week has been a fun one! I finally traveled to the other side of town to visit the maternity store. In just the past two weeks Baby has started to call attention to himself! On the way back from the store, I called (hands-free, of course) and told my “Uncle” Carl about the pregnancy. It was so neat to hear the pure excitement in his voice! He plans to come to South Carolina when we visit in July, and we worked out the dates for the trip. On Wednesday, we responded to an ad on Craig’s List and got ourselves a new crib and mattress at an amazing discount! And tomorrow I’m going to check out a gently used co-sleeper. If you don’t know what that is, it is a bassinet that will attach to the side of our bed and allow me to reach over and pick up Baby in the middle of the night, feed, and then put him right back down to sleep. It should definitely help with my arm and back issues.

Oh, did you want to read about today’s ultrasound? Anyone want to know what we’re having??? Maybe I should make you read a paragraph for each week I’ve had to wait. :) Maybe I should have you all make bets. Or maybe I should point you to a picture that tells the story? The most important thing, of course, is that everything with the pregnancy appears to be going just fine! Yay! Baby weighs a healthy 7 ounces, and we watched all four chambers of the heart pump beautifully. Several of you have asked about my baby registry, so I guess I should put the link up to that now. I’m using it as a list of things we will need, so please don’t think we are asking people to give us all that stuff! If anyone has access to gently used baby clothes or books, those are just as great of a gift as anything! But I think the kiddo will be just as happy with a loving “hurray” upon arrival! I wish more of you lived here so we could have an arrival party with goofy hats and whistles and stuff. :-)

Life is good

I love hearing advice from experienced moms, and I would love to hear from those of you who would like to share. I received a beautiful hand-written letter from my friend, Jen, today, along with a book. She is a mommy of two, and I admire her approach to motherhood and life. In her letter, she talks about slowing down, really hearing a child, taking it all in, and enjoying the moment. “There are some tough moments, but try to look at the joys of each phase. Focus on the good, the beauty, and the joy of new life.” Thank you, Jen! What a beautiful gift!

I know that this is our first child, so in one sense, we can never be prepared or know what to expect. But I wouldn’t have gotten pregnant if I wanted freedom, a good body, and sleep. I’ve already enjoyed those things for the last 12 years of marriage! I expect to be challenged, to be stretched, to be exhausted. But this is the thing – everything that I’ve ever done in life that felt worthy to the core has been exhausting. It has stretched me. It has made me become something more and challenged me to see the world differently. My hope is that, with a lot of patience and love, the next few years of my life can be beautiful, even if they are hard.

So, when you see me and talk to me over the next six months, let’s focus on “the good, the beauty, and the joy of new life.” Let’s bring this baby into the world in a spring of joy and happiness, welcoming the work, and acknowledging the fruitfulness of the efforts of parenthood. This is life at its most basic and its most beautiful. It’s love and responsibility and meaning. This new person needs a home, and we are happy to provide it, happy to be alive and able to enjoy the challenge!

Love to all.

Patience, patience! :-)

Well hello there! It’s week 16, and I finally have some energy again. YAY! I have a confession to make – I bought some children’s books. What can I say? This kid better love learning! Several of you wonderful people have asked about our baby registry, but we’d like to wait to share it until we know what gender this little one is. So, you’ll have to wait a couple more weeks, and I’ll link to it at the top of my blog. We’re very excited for that ultrasound on June 10th!

I’m starting to look a little pregnant over here, just a little. :) So maybe I’ll post a picture for you soon. We are having quite the heat wave these days, so I finally have energy, but it’s too hot to do much! It should cool down in a few days. One of the few advantages of living here are the mild summers…I’m hoping we’ll have another one this year.

Love to you all!

15 weeks

The past week has been special! I’m so glad we waited to announce until I was really comfortable with baby’s viability. By the time I talked to everyone, no one felt the need to hide their excitement. It made the day priceless.

A few people reacted in total shock – actually making me repeat myself! Grandma and Patty (Jason’s mom) come to mind. Actually, most people took a moment to process what I was saying. We’ve been married so long and have been through so much with my health, I think everyone has gotten used to it being just the two of us.

Just in time to celebrate a new week of pregnancy, a huge wave of exhaustion hit me today. I slept until nearly noon and took a nap a few hours later! Baby must be growing a lot this week. :) Bruce and Beverly kindly sent me a couple of pregnancy books in the mail – I guess it’s about time I start learning about pregnancy. For the most part, I prefer to think about the end result. :) Time seems to be dragging so slowly as I anticipate the ultrasound on June 10. The gender seems like an extra big deal to us, since we will only have one child. It is strange to think that I will only experience either raising a girl or a boy…I look forward to knowing which it will be!

Love at first sight